Saturday, November 19, 2011

Another mother loses her beautiful boy

"Call me" lit up my iPhone display yesterday.
A text message from my son.
It took me 30 minutes to break away from my time-sensitive urgent tasks and make the call.
He answered his phone and in tears blurted out, "Corey's dead".

Corey was my son's good friend who he met in rehab.
They became house-mates in an extended recovery program and a friendship developed.
I met him when my son brought a few of his 'new' friends home for dinner.
Corey was the one that stood out.
Handsome. Gregarious. Polite. Appreciative of the home-made meal. And oh, how he made us laugh. We were all doubled over in laughter at his stories.
Surely, this young man has a future ahead of him, I thought.

Our young friend (early 30s) had 18 months sobriety until yesterday when he overdosed.
Heroin, I'm sure. Details are still unknown.
Does it matter?
I can't sleep as I am overcome with saddness for the loss
and for the stabbing ache that must be devastating his mother.
I don't know her well, though we shared a few rides to Alanon many months ago.
Our schedules didn't always match. Then I stopped seeing her. I don't know if she is attending somewhere else.
Now I know why in the last couple weeks I have felt prompted to call her; "Hi S, would you like to attend a meeting with me tonight?"
I never called.
But now I will.
What I will say, I have no idea. I just have a longing to put my arms around her.
I want to bring her a lemon cheesecake.
One like I made for Corey when he celebrated his one year 'birthday'.
I had never seen such gratitude from anyone. He LOVED lemon cheesecake.

Oh, my God, please help this devastated family.
Please wrap your arms around this mama. Yours are bigger than mine.
Please help my son, and all of Corey's friends to comfort one another.
Please help me reach out to this mom in a meaningful way.

My day is calling so I must go.
Please pray for my mom-friend. She will need all the support she can get.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

"Ten Months Yesterday"

"Ten mo yesterday!" was the text I received from Dan just a few days ago. I cannot help but recall the hell I was living in this month last year. What a stark contrast. My son is returning to me. Slowly but surely, his 'old self' is coming back. His ability to have TONS of friends, his sense of humor, his willingness to help with the dishes.

I'm still waiting for other things to return. Not sure if they will. Maybe it just takes awhile. Waiting for him to want to grow up faster, to get focused on college or a career. Do you think I'm dreaming? He talks about it. I don't know yet if it's just talk. At least a few steps in the right direction: FASFA app submitted. Pell Grant confirmed as being available. Registered for the Fall. Will he be ready for the commitment? Will the stress be manageable? "One day at a time" - yes, I remember.

While I still worry and have my doubts and fears for the future, I have so much to be thankful for. He is clean. He is in sober housing. He is supporting other friends in recovery - even getting some into recovery. My salesman, now a recovery evangelist. Praise the Lord. My God, guide him.

I hope my online friends are finding ways to live One Day At A Time. I don't visit here as often as when I was in full-blown crisis, but I enjoy returning to do some catch-up reading and post an occasional thought.

Blessings to you all.